Sampai syurga

There's some time you need to find 'something', to find back your original *thing.
(thing here I would prefer to refer to LOVE)

When we are married, the love between the two will not remain as when we were(read : still are) deeply in love.

I might be not correct here. But this is just my personal thought.

Marriage is not only love for the two of us. Love is diverted to our kids, our mother, siblings, relatives, in-law especially the parents and all the rest.
It make me somehow understand what others mean by 'the man/woman love's when you are married will not be the same as now(before married) or lessen??'.
Yes, it will not. It will be diverted or in the correct word, is spread. Spreading the love.
For woman, the love diversion is sometimes hurt. But the longer you're in a marriage, it will become a natural feeling. I mean good-natural feeling.
And sometimes while learning the love-lessen part, we will gradually become a better person atleast to ourself. We can't be a selfish-love(or whatever)-taker (give and take thingy) partner. Throw away the selfish you and give more than we even take to get more love.
But, be extra cautious about the limit. There's a limit. Give-limit. If you have been giving for 20 years straight without being appreciated, without receiving anything in your hand, that's wrong. That is love-stupid.
Love-blind? Love-deaf too(in RIO movie :P)? Love-stupid?

Ok, enough with the introduction.

Faizal Tahir's songs is, no I mean mostly are awesome!

The songs are great to be hear repeatedly (still listening for 15 times now) and somehow make me memorizing back all my love memories. haha.
Memories sometimes need to be refreshen to find back your thing :)

I love my kids, my families and of course my soulmate >_<

Hey, I found my new hobby back, which is writing(altho most of them nonsense), I guess. And just for my memory sake, I started gardening too :)

Getting poorer ??

Don't you think we Malaysian are getting poorer? Or, in another words, everything are getting more expensive while our salary is remain flatttt. Don't you think the same?

Last Sunday I went to a mall to buy something for my nephew. He is just 2 months old and I think the most suitable thing is something for him to wear.

So, the mission begin. After hoping from shop to shop to another shop with empty handed and can't find any 'SALE' banner anywhere, I just bought a pair of sort of pajama. fuh~~~ everyhting was expensive. I bought it after 30% discount but still expensive for a baby clothes which I think around 40.

While waiting for my kids to play at the small-slide-call-playground, I went for another tour to few shops, but I think I can't rarely found anything below 50. Remind you that I am looking for 0-6 months old baby stuff ya~ not toddler or kids stuff yet.
That's why I think most of us opted for online boutiques which have more choices and brands with affordable price. Maybe some are not really an authentic items, but who cares? heheh
And, some*ehem*ehem* opted to shop just nearby their office while doing lunch. Maybe only few options, but sometimes few is better than too many choices heading to confusion :P

Since we're in Ikea and Ikea equal to curry puff, I bought a lot as our lunch. *hungry mode*

The conclusion for today is, the most satisfying and affordable part of the day is the food :)

Informative article : Respect Your Husband – Even If He Doesn’t Deserve It

Note :  this article was copied from Marriage Missions International

This article is pasted here just to share an informative materials with others and of course for me as a reminder :P. I think this is a very useful as nowadays there are so many resistance and hurdle in marriage life, not saying there were none in older days but because of so many man-equal-woman things is highlighted and not-only-men is working in a house, so sometimes this kind of reminder would be a drawback sort of warning to a woman called a wife :)

Topic(s): For Married Women

My husband, Ron, admits that he used to be jerk, but I discovered a secret formula that turned him into a loving husband: I started treating him like a VIP! Ron always wanted me to respect him, but I thought he had to earn it and I had to feel it, before I could do it. Wrong.

We women are very good at pointing out our husbands’ faults and failures and punishing them for not meeting our needs, but that only leads to discontent and distance in our marriages. We all know that yelling, nagging, and belittling are disrespectful and ineffective. So I’m suggesting a radical concept: Treat him like a king, and eventually, he will begin to treat you like a queen.

Instead of waiting for him earn your respect, behave respectfully and watch him grow into the man God designed him to be.

Twenty five years ago, our marriage was on the brink of divorce. I was controlling, critical and disrespectful so Ron was defensive and angry. We were both Christians but neither of us was living a spirit-filled life. I was letting my emotions determine my actions and thought it was Ron’s job to make me happy. But through a series of miracles (read my book for the whole story) we made a decision to rebuild our marriage.

We went to a Christian counselor who said “Nancy, the only way you will win Ron back and stay married is if you begin to respect your husband.” I knew he was right so I swallowed hard and came up with a plan.

Here are three of the ways I began to respect Ron: They are easy to remember because they spell out the goal—to treat him like a V.I.P.

Respect him Verbally, Intellectually, and Physically.

Verbally: Cut out (ok… cut back) complaining and add in compliments.

If you want to have a peaceful, happy marriage, learn the art of the compliment. Compliments are like magnets and the more you compliment your husband the more he will be attracted to you. Begin to notice when he does it right and verbally encourage him by complimenting him at least once a day.

If you are having a hard time thinking of anything to admire, consider these categories: physical traits, mental skills, financial strengths, spiritual growth, or healthy relationships with others (children, parents, or friends).

You may be asking “Hey, why should I compliment him when he NEVER compliments me?” It’s because, if you want your marriage to grow and bloom, you’ll have to water it with kindness and encouragement. Then, as he sees your sincere efforts, he will begin to change too. Don’t give up.

If you do need to bring up a difficult issue, place it between two compliments, also known as a “Compliment Sandwich.” Here’s an example, “Honey, I know how hard you work for our money and that Sally’s braces will be expensive, but I need your decision before her appointment tomorrow. I hope we can do this for her, but if you want to wait, I trust your judgment. What should I tell the orthodontist?”

Intellectually:

Men like to solve problems and fix things. So appeal to his intelligence by asking him to help you solve a problem. Instead of saying “This garage is a mess, clean up your camping stuff!” Try, “I’d like your help with something. Could you figure out a storage system for all the camping supplies?”
 
Don’t imply that he isn’t smart. Instead of saying “I think you are wrong about…” Say, “I’m confused about… please explain it again” (Remember to keep your tone of voice sarcasm-free.)

Request his help on Spiritual matters too. Ask him to explain a passage of Scripture or ask him to pray for you when you are going through a difficult time. If your husband is not the spiritual leader in your home, continue to pray for him and ask him if there is anything you are doing that is hindering his relationship with God.

Men don’t give a lot of weight to feelings—show them facts and they’ll be more likely to listen. For example: if he wants to buy a car that you think is too expensive, don’t launch into a hissy-fit, write out your monthly expenses and ask him what other things should be cut out in order to buy his car. Let the facts speak for you.

When you cannot reach an agreement, instead of trying to wear him down by nagging or crying say, “Is that your final decision or can I still try to convince you?” If it’s his final decision, then honor it. It’s freeing—let him carry the responsibility of your family.

Physically:

Physically ask what he would like you to do and then, do it. Find out what his top three needs are. Ron likes the laundry done, sex a least twice a week (guaranteed!) and he likes me to keep my “girly-make-up stuff” off of the bathroom counter. If these top needs are met, he’s content and easy to get along with. I know it sounds simple, but each of us have different things that make us feel loved and appreciated. You won’t know what he wants unless you ask him.

Be aware of your body language. You can communicate disrespect by rolling your eyes, crossing your arms, or slamming doors. Reflect your new decision to respect your husband in your heart, mind, and body.

Change your attitude and actions

Respect is both a verb and a noun: an action and an attitude so begin today to respect your husband in thought, word, and deed. He will be more willing and able to give you the love and affection you need if he is respected and admired. When I began to respect my husband, he was skeptical at first. However as he saw that I was committed to change, he began to treat me differently—lovingly. We now teach at couples’ events, helping others discover the blessings of true love in action.

Ask the Lord to strengthen you as you obey His word.

Hello, remember us?

for anybody that maybe forgotten how do I look, and how grown up are my kids, here are some pixs from my lappy. even not that latest, but good enough to share~

p/s:my hubby is a shy guy, so not revealing his face at this moment(untill I tell him I'd started blogging again :P)

Weekend in JB

Note : this is an old entry, but due to it's owner memory sake, it's blogged here.

All this while when we back to hometown in JB, we'll stayed in JB first where his mom stay,
and then follow by his grandma's house. His grandma's staying 11/2hrs north apart from JB, so we'll just say hi and bye.
But this time since we're early, we went to his grandma's house first. It's been a while since we visited her. Isk, jahat kan...And, what weirdly happen is, her grandma...oppss sorry, which is my grandma too...heheh...want to follow us to JB to visit her own daughter. Aish, when it comes to mom-child bond, the mom's bond will never defeated. Altho we feel 'oo..I had called her last week, so I'll call back a week later then' and we'll never feel that sorry for doing that. But, for our mom(hehe..I am a very 'new' mom) it's been an ages that we're not contacting her...

Okeh, back to the grandma story, yes...she did follow us to JB and stayed in my mom-in-law house. The rest, enjoy d pics..

it's pool time~~ in thistle JB (a very recommended hotel)

At their onyang's house-with d fake tiger to frighten the bad monkeysss

infront of their onyang house-'we are d superheros'

my onyang

A great memories on 2010

Note : This is an olddd entry and been blogged just for my own memory sake. tq.

2010 was a very memorable year for us. As the summary-we bought a car, a house, we had re-paint our curent car from not-so-red(pink) to blue, we HAD a maid and we sort of permanently working in Cyberjaya.
We bought our dream car on June.

our dream car :)

We had re-paint our current car from not-so-red-aka-pink color to blue. 

from this sort of color-->

to this color-pix googled

We got our house key around July. And we moved in around Aug, just few weeks before Ramadhan. And, surprisingly we already had 3 events in this house; masuk rumah doa selamat, Raya open house and Ako's 6th birthday bash.

our house-pix googled

We had a maid on May but she ran away on Dec-I can't remember well.

pix googled

And, we are both now working in Cyberjaya and at this moment not thinking to shift to another working location(read : location).

So no long-detail stories to write, just as my diary setter that my 2010 was a year to remember.
Alhamdulillah~~

My parents n gang balik

nak sambung cerita sikit pasal sabah...
we all balik on tuesday, wed terus keje. but my parents n gang dok seminggu which balik on 11th. We 3 beranak (hubby keje) tumpang ngan my cousin gi airport naik bas persiaran yg dipandu oleh my cousin utk ambik diorang.

Alani yg nak jugak duduk kat depan trolley tu...with cousins and aunt..

Dan, yg bestnya lepas balik dr airport...ingatkan semua org bercadang nak balik ke tpt masing2 terus....tetapi.....suddenly all of us headed to my hometown...all was my idea...yg nak makan udang dan ikan besar2 dan fresh2(tanpa perlu memasak sendiri dirumah) yg dikirim oleh my cousin dr sabah bersama luggage parents me...nak makan sedap kena pandai ni....huhu.

Hubby yg abis keje kol 10pun jadi mangsa..kena balik telukintan...tp, dia actually rela kot(assume sendiri) sbb dia memang penggemar udang yg amat sejati....tq hubby!!

'Adhoc' trip to Sandakan

Me actually baru balik dr Sandakan kelmarin. 4D3N trip on Sat untill Tue using MAS low fares. Dlm sibuk2 training dan sepatutnya tak blh cuti...tp, luckily finally boss kasik jugak cuti. Itupun last minute approved on Fri evening.
We booked this flight on January but mcm takde kesempatan nak cerita dlm blog yg akhir2 ni mcm terpinggir je...kesian TENNITODOKU ni kan....hehe

Ok, cerita pasal Sandakan trip. BEST BEST dan SANGAT BEST! itu je word yg boleh mendescribekan perasaan balik dr sana.
Actually Sandakan itself takdela happening sgt. Dan, kami pun takde special plan nakgi memana kat sana memandangkan me pun tak confirm blh cuti ke tak.
Thx a lot to my cousin yg jadi tourist guide kat sana.

Kami pergi 9 org-me, hubby, Ako, Alani, my parents, my bro, auntie and cousin.

kami br sampai airport kol 7 pagi-nak pergi 9 org..tp yg hantar...hehe

dlm plane...ako n alani were doing very 'well'...n d other pix is the Sandakan view from plane...cantik!

On Sat-no special activity since kami sampaipun dah kol 3 mcm tu. Weather - mcm sini jugak..cuma time- mcm dok kat GMT +9 meaning to say subuh awal dan mlmpun awal.
Mlm tu kami mkn IKAN IKAN dan IKAN. Kat situ tepi laut dan memang ikan sangatla murah dan fresh.

On Sun-round bandar Sandakan including shopping but tak lama sgt..so, mcm takdela blh shopping beriya. But...still sempat rembat pearls, kristal, kuih muih, kain batik, kain pelikat.
Lunch kat pasar dan mlm tu mkn ikan yg bykkkkk kat pasar sim sim dan selepas tu Bowling session!! haha..punyala adhocnya...

orang utan yg sorang2 je nak mkn..nasib kami tak brp baik sbb takde org utan yg lapar..so, tgk sekor ni jela... :(

On Mon-my cousin ajak pergi pulau...tgk PENYU..huhu...'betul ke?'
dan....dgn adhocnya kamipun naik bot selama sejam setengah heading ke Pulau Selingan. Sampai sana dah gelap sbb sebelum tu kami pergi tgk Org Utan kat Sepilok...altho below expectation sbb cuma dpt tgk 2 ekor je WILD org utan..tp, terubatla sbb lepas tu dpt tgk PENYU!!!

Penyu yg dtg bertelur kat sini...mlm tu lebih kurang 20 ekor dtg...memang menakjubkan.....dan pagi tu, kami terjumpa anak penyu yg baru nak masuk ke laut...
FYI-telur penyu kat sini semua dikutip utk pemeraman terkawal dan lepas tu baru dilepaskan...



ni pagi kami jumpa anak penyu...ako siap nak bawak balik nak bela..hehe...semua excited je...satu lagi pantainya memang best..bersih...hubby n my bro n cousin sempat snorkling kejap...diorang ckp memang lawa...
pix sebelah tu hubby n budak2 ni bergaya dgn senjata2 polis yg bejaga kat situ...diorang sentiasa ada sbb pulau tu betul2 sempadan Philippine...

Basi weekend activities

Punyala malas nak update blog skrg ni. Hutang tag kawan2 ada byk ni. haiya...napela malas sgt ni. Nak carik phone yg boleh update blog terusla..so, takyahla nak carik pc nak udpate kan.

Last week, utk kesekian kalinya dpt berhujung minggu dgn hubby di rumah sendiri. Sblm nipun adala, cuma ada hal je selalu. Balik my hometown, his howetown etc. This week, we went to our favorite Sg Congkak utk mandi manda. Ni record la...paling lama berendam kat sungai dan lepak kat situ. Kami bertolak dlm kol2, sampai rumah dlm kol 7. Gambar2nya akan diupload kemudian.

And, on Sunday we went to Bagan Lalang, Sepang to mkn ikan bakar. Agak lama sungguh kami tak menikmati ikan bakar. Kami keluar rumah agak awal, tp malangnya bateri kereta KONG!! sob sob..so, kenala mintak tolong org situ utk jump bateri. Dan, oleh kerana hari tu Ahad, tiada workshop yg buka..kamipun gamble je la jln sampai Sepang yg makan masa lebih dr sejam...dan, bila sampai sana punyala konfiden mati enjin. Tup tup..takleh start! kakaka..kenala mintak org lain jump lagi....dan, yg bestnya masa mkn ikan bakar...tak mati enjinpun..hehe..

If anyone doesnt know yet, the spot already become a Bagan Lalang goldcoast. Happening habis tempat tu. Nice and cantik...worth to go. Tempat tu dah jadi mcm PD lak..siap ada gerai jual mcm2..ada byk warong..pantaipun dah upgrade..cuma mcm tak sesuai nak mandi sbb pantai payakan..so, berlumpurla. Skrg diorang siap tgh buat byk chalet tgh laut tu...wo..impressed betul me..tak sangka it was a memorable journey.

Ikan bakar...mcm biasa..BEST!! memang takleh lawan la kat mana2pun kalau nak mkn ikan bakar. Kami order ketam masam manis, udang+sotong goreng tepung, terubuk(yg BYKKK giler tulang tu..tp SEDAP sgt) bakar. Memang puas hati. Except ketam tu mcm tak berapa elok sikit..mcm berbau..but, ini memang very rare happen to this kedaila. Eh, nama kedai ni...senandung malam kot..kalau tak salah. Total kami mkn : RM40++ . tak termasuk ketam tu sbb kami komplen berbau...

Kesimpulannya-- what a weekend!! Pictures..will upload later.

FLA----WER n TE RIII

Alani suka bunga!!! kemana2 dia pergi, first benda yg dia akan focus ialah FLA---WER(flower) and TE RII(tree).


So, last week we went to Tmn Bunga raya and Tmn Orkid near to Lake Garden at Jln Duta.
Hmm...kesimpulannya tak brp best. Tak terjagala bunga-bungannnya dan semua pokok2nya. Tp, okla sekadar nak jln2 penuhkan aktiviti hujung minggu.

Incidentss

25th and 26th was my bro's wedding. All goes as we planned, alhamdulillah. 25th is the nikah and bride's reception in Ipoh, and the next day is our side's reception.Almost all our family members were here, thanks a lot. And, also special thanks to Mas and Ogy for your time*wink*
Unfortunately the nikah been delayed coz my youngest bro and hubby had met accident. sob sob. 2 kereta terlibat. My cousin car was terbabas into kebun getah and my bro car terbabas dan langgar pokok getah. Alhamdulillah they were not too bad injured. Shahrul(my little bro) had 7 stitch on head and 5 stitch kat betis, while my hubby had 1 stitch kat atas mata, bawah kening sikit. But, he can't walk properly yet, kaki bengkak maybe sbb terlanggar dashboard, and also dadapun still sakit. Got few scratches kat kaki and tangan. Mintak2 they all will recover fast. I still at my hometown, on unpaid leave i believe...belum check ngan HR.
Semua org doakan ye. Semoga my hubby cepat boleh jalan betul2...tu tgh pegi farmasi beli ubat dan tongkat...

Raya....

Ni la sebahagian gambar2 raya haritu. Punyala berzaman nak upload gambar..syawal pun dah masuk ke 20...tinggal lagi 10 hari je nak mood raya ni...hehe...punyala lama.
Semua org best tak raya? hehe..banyak tak kumpul duit raya(utk anak2 or diri sendiri), dan banyak tak spent masa raya? huh...cerita spent masa raya....boleh tahan penangannya kan..thn depan raya, rasa mcm nak start beli dr skrg je...esp nya baju sendiri la..hehe....sebenarnya dah terbeli kain utk diri sendiri masa nak beli kain utk hantar my bro kawen nanti...maybe jadi salah satu..ke salah dua...kekek....utk raya...
Bila dah ada anak ni...kemeriahan raya tu lebih sikitkan...Anyway, selamat hari raya ke-19. (sempat ke nak puasa 6 ni...sambil ganti puasa...) ...

raya pertama di Johor..sampai raya ke 4

Ako n Alani bersama bapa2 saudaranya...dan, us.

raya kedua....dan bersama beloved mom on raya ke...brp ek...tak ingat..hehe